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Name: AKA
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Sunday, August 05, 2007
Today it just hit me that I am really missing my little sister growing up while being away. I just saw some pictures of her that were taken today and comparing that to just a few months ago when I was home, she seems so much older! I didn't think 8 year olds could hit growth spurts like that in 3-4 months! She just looked much more mature and different and it's bothering me so much.
I haven't seen her since I got here since their webcam does not work and no one's had time to get a replacement so the change seems so sudden. My mom said she'd gotten taller, but I guess because changes in your face are so gradual that people you see every day don't notice.
She and I are about 16 years apart - I always knew there'd come a time where my brother (3 years younger than me) and I would be off living our lives and she'd be on her own. And for some reason I almost feel guilty. Like I should be there in her house to play with her and be bored with her, especially now that she's on summer vacation. Despite there being 4 other people in the house right now (parents, brother and my grandmother), she's just as alone since everyone is busy. They make time for her as best as they can, but it's so different from when my brother and I were little.
Back then we'd have each other to annoy and play with when we were bored and our parents had more time. But both my parents run their own businesses so there's always something to be done and their working hours can be all over the place. And my brother is moving out next month to start a Masters program in downtown Toronto.
By the time I'm done this program she'll be a little over 10 years old and I feel like she's growing up without me, other than on the phone. My brother and I have had such a big influence on each other's lives and I'm afraid we won't get to have the same bond with her.
This is not a whining fest about how unfair life is - I'm grateful for this opportunity for my life to be here to study, but sometimes I wish I had stayed home just for her sake.
(the picture on the top left is of my dad and sister at the beach when they came down here to Australia with me in May)
Labels: family
11 Comments:
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My brother and I are 12 years apart and even though I see him everyday, I understand what you mean. My sisters are closer in age to me and we grew up together and always had each other to talk and play with. I worry about him like how you do about your sister because I know my sisters and I will be out of the house while he's growing up and because I feel guilty for that, I try to be with him as much as possible even if it's just doing annoying things. When I'm not home, I call him, and even though he pretends that he doesn't want to talk to me, I can tell he likes it that I call. Your phone calls will mean a lot to her and she WILL love that time she gets to talk to you on the phone, and talking to you will make her want to see her more, so she'll look forward even mor eto your visits. You and your brother should set up a "special time" each day for her when you can call her and she knows to expect a call, or even have a three-way conversation with her - an 8 year old would love that attention!
Humz - Could you tell her that? lol, thanks though :) she knows she can call me anytime - and she has before she learned the time difference!
Haleem - That's very true - I've learned to appreciate family and friends a lot more since being away.
Zendenizen - Once they learn to talk, they learn to talk back haha! But I know what you mean, every time you turn around these kids have grown a foot or are doing something so adult-like.
Hana - I would love to be there for Noorie! I am definitely going to be home in December - I think I'm back around Dec 17th...will keep you posted.
'liya - it's nice to know someone who has a similar issue with a sibling :) I am definitely going to try to work out something with my brother so we can do that. Even teach her to use MSN maybe? It's funny you mentioned doing annoying things - as mean as it may be, my brother and I annoy her a lot and my mom always gets mad at us for it! But we tell her that my sis won't have a normal sibling relationship if we don't do it, so we're doing it out of love for her sake haha!
I guess it doesn't help that she lives with my dad and I don't speak to him anymore. Talk about missing a little girl's childhood.
Now that I'm back, Alhamdulillah, I've done as much as I could to get close to her, and it's great! :)
Except, sometimes, my parents still treat me as if it was 6 years ago..hehe!