Do you ever get the feeling that you are more aware than others? That you are more in tune to the world around you and that you just get "it" and that most people are missing "it". This may be the feeling you get when you see the popularity of mock-celebrities such as Paris Hilton, hear about people falling over the newest diet fad (heard of the "texture diet"? This is the one in which each meal is made up of four different food items: one crunchy, one soft, one hot, and one cold. In addition, the plate must also be made up of foods that are in bold, contrasting colors), or when you look at the number of people who voted George W. Bush in for a second term.

I wouldn't say that I feel I am better than anyone else - though mind you, I may feel that way if and when I win a Pulitzer, til then I'm keeping a modest profile - but it's this awareness that you seem to understand more than others. Could it be that the world is just made up of the naive and non-naive and I just fall into the latter category? Well, no, that's probably not it since I did end up believing that by purchasing anti-aging products I could prevent non-existent wrinkles (stupid infomercial).

I think people have a need for wanting to feel both part of the crowd and singled out. We don't want to stray too far from the flock for fear that we won't be let back in and will be alone. But, at the same time, we want to stick out enough so that others see that we are special. It's an odd tug-o'-war. Of course there are those who will fall into extremes on either side of the spectrum, but what's the point of a spectrum if there are no extremes, right? You may think this is not true, ("who me? Want to be special? Nah, I'm fine just the way I am!") but we have all made some sort of attempt to get attention and make our mark - to be remembered.

Don't believe me? Everything from wanting to move up in a career, to joining Facebook (evilevilevil) and even creating a blog is a way to inform people that you are alive and have something of importance to contribute to the world before your chance is over. Heck, even the guy belting out schmaltzy love songs while strumming away on his gutiar in the subway station is vying for attention and maybe even hoping some sort of music producer will be so moved that he'll snatch him up right there and sign him to a million dollar contract.

So is it a bad thing? Should we be content with what we have rather than wonder how many friends you have on you MySpace page compared to your best friend? Hell no. What kind of prosaic life would that be. People would being to wander aimlessly in the streets, having no real goals. Girls wouldn't long for a signature Tiffany necklace in order to make their friends jealous. Guys wouldn't go near a shopping centre since they won't care about making a good impression. Scientists wouldn't race to finish their experimental trials in order to be the first to publish their findings. Dostoevsky would not have had a norm to revolt against with his existential views because there would be no norm.

Truth is, we need to have a bigger mass of people who are slightly naive and prefer to conform so that those who want to diverge from the crowd will have something to diverge from. Like it or not, without the ditzy teen queens of the popular media (I'm talking to you Hilton, Lohan, Spears), you wouldn't pay much attention to the ones who were "different" or making a significant contribution to the world (cue: Angelou, Ferrara, Klein, Maathai). Maybe these ladies in the latter category are more aware than the "ladies" in the former; they get "it".

P.S. I was kidding about the Pulitzer thing. I wouldn't think of myself as being better having won that. Now the Nobel prize...that's a different story...I'd totally be better than the non-Nobel prize winners.